Last week I got the news that someone I knew passed away.
.
I didn’t know her real well;
she was old
and seemed to have lived a happy life.
.
But her passing was swift and unexpected;
And my own grief more powerful than I knew.
.
As I walked out of the building she lived in
hand in hand with my 3 year old,
I felt it swell inside me like a balloon.
.
Do I swallow this lump growing in my throat?
Do I ignore the wave rising in my chest?
.
I reached the sidewalk and decided I had nothing to lose.
I stopped
and sobbed.
.
My daughter looked up at me in the bright sunlight and asked, “what’s wrong mommy? Why are you sad?”
.
I told her that our friend had left and we wouldn’t see her again.
.
She pulled my hand and I brought my face close to hers.
“It’s ok to cry,” she said with tenderness curled around the edges of her voice.
.
“I know,” I said. “It’s ok to cry.” As if repeating her words reinstated their truth. “But. . .can you hug me?”
.
Without a word she wrapped her little arms around me.
.
There we sat on a sidewalk on Villa street,
in sunny Southern California,
held captive in a tight embrace.
What a sight we must have been;
a toddler comforting her mother.
.
👉🏼No one can tell you how to be sad.
When to be sad.
Where to be sad.
.
But its expression is needed in a land of
“I’m fine”s
and
“I’m ok”s.
.
As a culture we tend to suppress any emotion we deem as “negative.”
But what’s more negative:
the emotion or the suppression of that emotion?
.
You can try to hide it
or bury it.
But like a planted seed hidden in the darkness of soil, it will grow toward the light.
Like water it moves through small cracks
and leaking dams.
Like fire it clears out the old
and welcomes the new.
.
Tears and laughter and grief and joy is the heart rebirthing.
.
Let the Phoenix die and be reborn.
.
.
.
#balancepeacepurpose
.
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#balancepeacepurpose #stillirise #riseagain #bevulnerable #itsokaynottobeokay #grief #heal #healing #riselikeaphoenix #holdingspace #letsbereal #letitout #truthtalk #workingitout #courageovercomfort #reborn #theotherside #heartspace #honestly #heartopen #lettinggo #mytruth #wellbeing #letstalkaboutit #mentalwellness #thistooshallpass #innervoiceoflove #surrender #energyclearing #itiswell
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