It was not my day today. It has not been my year. 2018 has been nothing but pain (both physically and emotionally), rehab, pain again, time off, more pain, more time off, more rehab and always feeling like the two steps I take forward are met with being knocked back 3. It has been a year of being completely humbled. Today was a day that I had to step back and ask myself “why do I run?” It’s a question I end up asking myself when I AM running, but probably more so due to being uncomfortable. But this time it’s the legit and raw question. Why do I run?
💚 I could say I run because I rock a mean mom-of-three bod. But really I run because it feels damn amazing to know this mom-of-three bod just did that thing. That 13.1 miles in one go. That 26.2 thing that tested my physical limits.
💙 I run because it fills my soul. Deep down at that emotional level. 💚I run because I feel a sense of accomplishment and productivity.
💙I run for my family. My family that has had one woman’s love for the sport transform us into something whole, supportive, and rock solid.
💚I run for joy. Not happiness. But JOY. The feeling after working hard to accomplish something great.
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I stood in the front corral this morning and had a prime view of all the adrenaline pumping pre race goodness. I thought back to where I was almost a year ago and tried to choke back tears as I looked around and thought to myself “look at where you are. You fought back through so much and didn’t give up, and you’re here.” Those tears ended up streaming out as I crossed the starting line.
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So while days like today suck, it’s not in my nature to give up. I have so many reasons to run.
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I’ll be having bloodwork done soon to see if something is not right. Something just doesn’t feel right.
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But I will never give up. Never.
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#run #running #runner #rununited #runnersofinstagram #runnerscommunity #igrunners #marathoner #perserverance #goals #nevergiveup #womenwhorun #icaniwill #watchme
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