In Mind-
Guilt is that but an internal tattoo that has stained my mind. The ink of my guilt is dark and smudged. Guilt is a reoccurring revolution like a record spinning. Guilt is being out at 5am with no way home. The life that you live and the love that you have given is something that you have the complete control over. Guilt is a mountain that you have to climb in order to carry on with your life. My eccentricity and my mannerisms have been formed based on guilt. On an ego; of a persona of somebody who has hurt once but lived twice. That of a persona or means of protection from letting people get too close. Once their too close they get hurt. Once they get past my persona , a cycle of tendencies of hurting people and feeling guilty shines through. Under a spell, crashed down by the waves life is not how a child imagines it to be. But it’s life. You live it. You feel it. You embrace it. For going back to your childhood in your mind is something that we as a human race use as a coping mechanism. Having a guilt free, care free, childhood is a form of comfortability that we crawl back too. The numbness of a drink let’s go of the guilt, the warmth when it’s cold and the conversations with faces with no names are that of a means of coping with yourself and the guilt you uphold. The nights that become days with names you wouldn’t imagine are a sign of the time, the time of your life. Then the morning comes, you are you again. You barely remember the night before and you begin to feel that guilt fighting the inside of your head. The guilt that looms over you; the dark cloud of regret that feels the sky in which your head is placed. The modern day hopelessness in place of myself. -
Connor fennell♏️
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#writing #writersofinstagram #guilt #burning #flowers #roses #love #aesthetic #deepwriting
#writing #writersofinstagram #guilt #burning #flowers #roses #love #aesthetic #deepwriting
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